Dozens of young mothers gathered at the Lenasia South Civic Centre in Johannesburg on Monday 30 November to begin the journey of turning their lives around and change their mindsets regarding gender-based violence (GBV).

The motivational session was hosted by Queen Rabotapi-Kamanga, herself a victim of GBV. Rabotapi-Kamanga hosted the event in collaboration with her husband and other ordinary folk. Addressing the about 100 teenage mothers, Rabotapi-Kamanga said the aim of the gathering was to empower the young mothers and help them start on a journey to turn their lives around.

A mother feeds her toddler at the Lenasia South Civic Centre on 30 November 2020 during a motivational gathering for teen mothers in Johannesburg, Gauteng. (Photo: Bheki Simelane)

Rabotapi-Kamanga beat all the GBV odds to turn her life around. Raped by a complete stranger at just 14 years old, and suffering abuse at the hands of her stepfather, Rabotapi-Kamanga said she grew up with much anger and bitterness. 

When she was 16, she had an abusive boyfriend who beat her up and verbally and emotionally abused her.

“I was made to believe that I was not good enough. It was impossible for me to achieve my goals,” she said. 

“I adapted to the fact that every time he abused and beat me up, he would make me believe that it was all my fault, and I would feel it was my fault. I protected him from my family because I didn’t want tensions between him and my family.

“He was extremely possessive of me and threatened to kill me if I left him for another man. When it finally dawned to me that the relationship was too toxic and I chose to leave him, he beat me to a pulp and I fell into a coma. However, at this point I was ready to leave him.” 

She said after all the abuse she became stronger because she knew what she wanted. 

Communities in the south of Johannesburg have been battling a number of socioeconomic challenges, including lack of housing, lack of proper sanitation, unemployment, drug and alcohol addiction, and poverty. However, this did not deter the teens from stepping out of their homes and attending the gathering. 

“Too many young people are addicted to drugs and alcohol in the community, and wearing the Miss Teen crown gives other young girls confidence and drive,” said Lenasia South Miss Teen, Nelisiwe Hadebe, 17.

“I want young people in my hood and the whole country to dream big and turn their lives around. I want them to be driven.”

“We identified a big problem in our country and thought we should do our bit,” said Malungelo Kamanga, Rabotapi-Kamanga’s husband.

“Political deployment is depriving these young mothers of many other opportunities outside the school environment, and we are here to instil some belief in their God-given talents such as music and the arts. We want to make sure that they outmuscle GBV challenges and other challenges within their homes.” 

The event took place at a time of increasing GBV cases in South Africa, especially during the lockdown period where victims found themselves locked in their homes with their habitual abusers.

In June, following a spate of GBV incidents, the South African Police Services (SAPS) said in all the cases where suspects were arrested, the victim was in a relationship with the suspect. However, some victims are still shunned when they report cases to the SAPS. “It is these circumstances that make the prevention of crimes against women and children that much more complex,” the SAPS said at the time.

In communication at the end of October, the SAPS acknowledged that they needed to do more at police stations to support victims of GBV. 

“All of us must fight the second pandemic of GBV and as officers of the law, this fight starts at police stations by improving the quality of service we provide to victims and survivors of GBV and femicide,” Police Minister Bheki Cele said.

“Given the scourge of gender-based violence in the country… government is implementing the Emergency Response Action Plan on Gender-Based Violence and Femicide, which was announced by President Cyril Ramaphosa in September 2019,” a statement from the government said as the 16 Days campaign kicked off on 25 November.

Gospel musician Malesia Makhetha told the Lenasia South gathering, “You need to accept who you are, because sugar daddies are not an option. You need to love yourselves first and not dwell on mistakes such as having babies at a young age. Once you accept who you are, you will be able to handle rejection in all its forms.” 

Makhetha said it was no longer about what politicians can do on the issue, but that everyone should lend their support to the young mothers, women and children.

“This event was an eye-opener,” young Lenasia South mother Ntebogeng Molefi said. She said her biggest wish was to return to school and that her biggest takeaway from the event was the call for every young woman to be brave and speak out against GBV and other forms of abuse.

Johannesburg Emergency Services (JES) Liaison Officer Gugu Manana said the JES had committed to providing teenage mothers with training to protect themselves against GBV. 

“I myself have been there, as I suffered immense abuse at home as a young girl, but I soldiered on until I found my own path,” she said.

“Be purpose-driven, it doesn’t matter where you start,” said make-up artist Smangele “Knox” Tshabalala.

“I’m here to ensure that each one of us is able to deal with our difficult challenges so that they do not define us and our destinies in life. I’m here to say enhance who you are. We all have stories to share, but when we do, we should not shame one another as women.” DM