Illustrative image | EFF MP Carl Niehaus. (Photo: Gallo Images / Darren Stewart) | DA leader John Steenhuisen. (Photo: Gallo Images / Jeffrey Abrahams) 
Stuffed animals, 48 bottles of fine wine, a leather hat and shotgun cartridge case, biltong, a fieldbar cooler, four Nguni hides, a windbreaker, a mohair jersey and a beekeeping suit and instruction manual.
This, you might think, sounds like the beginning of a potential wild night out foraging for honey while taunting killer bees in Constantia with either a taxidermied dassie, or a plushy penguin, depending on your interpretation of “stuffed” animal.
These are just a few of the cool gifts DA leader and Minister of Agriculture, John Steenhuisen, has scored so far since the Government of National Unity (GNU) kicked itself into life in 2024.
Agrilove
Steenhuisen experienced first hand the hospitality of the agricultural sector, which showered him with the abovementioned gifts.
There are others including “a tartan wool tie” from the UK Minister of Trade and Industry, and which we look forward to seeing the minister wear. Then there is an Ostrich RSA flag and various plumes “for display in his office in Pretoria” — a very queer-eye-for-ministerial-decor moment.
And the least appealing of the lot, “a breakfast display/various cereals of unknown value from PepsiCo”. Steenhuisen pointed out that this was for the office, probably somewhere in a corner, maybe there by the photocopier.
Added to this were “various Macadamia products” and “ostrich meat”.
With regard to Steenhuisen’s shares and other interests he ticked “nothing to declare”, said he did not perform paid work outside Parliament and had no sponsorships.
He declared a townhouse of 112 square metres in Sea Point. The minister got to travel to Uganda, sponsored by the African Union, and caught a plane to bucket-list Bothaville, sponsored by GrainSA.
Blues for Carl
EFF MP Carl Niehaus, on the other hand, had absolutely “nothing to declare” apart from his political genius (with apologies to Oscar Wilde).
As an ordinary party-hopping MP the gift train seems to have passed him by. Niehaus, notorious for his fancy financial footwork, informed Parliament that at this point in time he had no land, property, shares or other financial interests, no work outside Parliament, no directorships or partnerships, no sponsorships, no gifts whatsoever, no travel, nada.
No trusts, no income-generating assets. He lived in a rented 100 square metre apartment in Gauteng, and the only “retainership” he mentioned was a “public relations and media consultancy in his personal capacity”.
“Reputation in tatters?” “Call Carl”, “Carl Niehaus” — (just a suggestion, take it or leave it).
Commander-in-Chief
EFF leader Julius Malema has had years of experience handling money, so one would expect astute future squirrelling.
He had nothing to disclose in the category of shares and other interests, but did mention his listing as a director of Mgagao Shamba PTY, “which is involved in farming, events, and sales activities”.
“Farming events” of course is open to interpretation, probably in the new Land Court later in the year.
Malema declared no sponsorships but fessed up to a bottle of wine and Lindt Lindor chocolates, a gift from the Embassy of the People’s Republic of China. Perhaps Steenhuisen and Malema can arrange an evening of competitive wine tasting as a toenadering (rapprochement in Fringlish).
The BaPedi Queen, Leganabatho 11 Manyaku Thulare, gifted the commander-in-chief two live sheep, which were valued at R7,000, said Malema.
He also owned no land, no property and no rented property. He remained a beneficiary of the famous Ratanang Family Trust and was a trustee and beneficiary of the Munzhedzi Family Trust, along with Mantoa Matlala, Ratanang Malema, Munzhedzi Malema and Kopano Malema.
The leader noted he was also a trustee of the Kopano Charity Trust, a trustee and beneficiary of the Mazimbu Investments Trust, alongside Mantoa Matlala, Ratanang Malema, Munzhedzi Malema, and Kopano Malema.
MK finances
Duduzile Zuma-Sambudla, the daughter of former president Jacob Zuma and now an MP in his family project and the country’s official opposition, the uMkhonto Wesiswe (MK) party, is as asset-free as her father, it seems.
She had zilch shares or financial interests to declare and said she received no remuneration for work outside Parliament (this she does for free on social media). She has no directorships, partnerships, consultancies or retainerships.
Zuma-Sambudla received no gifts (counting out the removal of Floyd Shivambu as secretary-general of the party), no loans and had no land or property to declare apart from a 60 square metre rented property in Cape Town’s Waterfront. Over and above this, there are no trusts in her name.
Former Transnet executive and MK MPs Brian Molefe, who handed himself over alongside Siyabonga Gama to the Investigating Directorate for Corruption (Idac) in June, had little to declare other than their upcoming fraud matter.
Molefe declared 100 ordinary shares of nominal value in Karibu Farming PTY (Ltd) with no land or trust or sponsorships or gifts (those are in the charge sheet).
Former Prasa Ceo Lucky Montana, also an MK MP, declared a directorship in the Montana Strategy Group involved in “strategy development, consulting and advisory services but dormant since establishment”.
Read more: It’s now Lucky Montana against the world: Ex-Prasa CEO defies mountain of evidence against him
Under “Benefits and Interest Free Loans”, Montana listed Midtownbrace (PTY) LTD “investment into joint venture agreement for property development”.
Mmusi Maimane’s smarts
Build One South Africa (Bosa) party leader Mmusi Aloysias Maimane appears to be more astute about planning for the future. He declared shares in two companies, 100 ordinary shares in Bokamoso PTY LTD, with the “nominal value of R100” and described as “consulting and trading”.
He also declared 40 shares with a nominal value of R40 in Black Shots. With regard to work outside Parliament, Maimane said he had resigned from “Phangela Security”.
Directorships and partnerships declared were: Equanimity Wealth in the business of “consulting and catering”, the New Africa Foundation of which he is the chair, Bosa NPC, categorised as “political work”, and the MPO One South Africa movement.
Under consultancies and retainerships, Maimane wrote that he provided “security” consulting to “Phangela to Bokamoso”. The swings and roundabouts of consulting, they say.
Maimane declared no gifts, no travel or sponsorships. Property assets were disclosed as a residential home in Roodepoort with an estimated size of 1,000 square metres. (Take that, Carl.)
The Bosa leader listed his involvement with the Kgalaletso Kgosi Trust, with beneficiaries being Kgalaletso, Natalie, Kgosi and Kutlwano Maimane.
From the arms of Papa
Former convicted bank robber turned politician and now Minister of Sport and Culture, Gayton McKenzie, of the Patriotic Alliance, is involved in more than 28 companies, either as a director or in partnership.
He declared no shares or other financial interests or work outside of Parliament, but it is clear McKenzie has been building a nest egg since his release.
Directorships and partnerships (since deregistered) in which McKenzie had a stake include logistics, media, mining and exploration, film and television, a micro brewery, a record label, health and wellness, night clubs and entertainment and liquid gas distribution.
The companies listed by the PA leader were: Amantenda 523, Lexshell 138 (General Trading), Raystar Productions (film and TV), Gas Afrique (investments), Afrobrew Beverages (micro brewery), G Gas (LPG distribution) Dirbyn Utilities (general trading), Gayton McKenzie (general trading), African Australian Minerals and Energy (mining and exploration), Dirbyn Investment Holdings (investment), Daringo Trading 213 (general trading), Taboo Trading 189 (nightclub and entertainment), Megafone Telecoms (ICT), Halowiz Investments (investments), ZAR Productions (film and television), Dream Weaver Trading 445 (general trading), Dirbyn Publications (media), Gayton McKenzie Distributions (general trading), Tobiwell (health and wellness), Talirex (general trading), NSO What Trading (film and television), Nu Money Records (record label), Black Solar (solar trading), Damash Minerals (mining and exploration), Portkey SA (logistics), Hustlers Empire (investment holdings), Science Fixing (mining consultancy).
McKenzie also listed the Patriotic Alliance under this heading.
The register noted under “Gifts and Hospitality” that McKenzie is mentioned as the source of a gift of “Soweto Derby Soccer tickets” of unknown value to Ms Nonceba Bianca Mhlauli, the Deputy Minister in the Presidency. However, in his own declaration, he had nothing to disclose in this category.
McKenzie declared no land or property and no trusts.
Rise Mzansi
Songezo Siphiwo Zibi, leader of Rise Mzansi and currently chairperson of Parliament’s Standing Committee on Accounts, was a former associate editor of the Financial Mail and former editor of Business Day.
It comes as no surprise that he is familiar with the financial markets and foresees old age and retirement. It also makes him a perfect chairperson for the Standing Committee on Public Accounts as the man is financially literate. (Feel free to absorb any financial tips here.)
Zibi listed shares and other financial interests in Absa Group Limited: 7,000 ordinary shares valued at R1.1-million; Investec Bank Limited: 3,050 ordinary shares, valued at R410,000; Shoprite Limited: 1,300 ordinary shares, valued at R377,000; Sibanye Stillwater: 1,000 ordinary shares, valued at R17,700; MTN Group: 1,300 ordinary shares, valued at R122,000; Ninety One Limited: 1,488 ordinary listed shares worth R65,400.
Zibi had “nothing to disclose” under the rest of the headings.
Should you have time on your hands, we have dropped the register in for your own perusal. Enjoy. DM