Harnessing the start and end of your days for a greater sense of control

As we enter the last month of the year, we might tend to “hang on” for the holidays, as the general feelings of mental and physical fatigue set in. We may start to think about how next year things may be different or better, and how we might make some better choices in terms of our health, our lifestyle and our habits.

Yet, there is another option: start with simple improvements now, and reap some of the positive benefits when the old year clicks over into the new.

It can be immensely empowering to design a positive morning routine, and tailor-make it to suit your lifestyle. You may think that you are too busy or too rushed in the mornings to introduce a routine into your life, but the truth is, you already have one. The question is, is it a positive or negative series of actions; and is it serving you, and beginning your day in the right way?

How soon after you wake up do you check your phone for messages and emails? How early do you read the news? Do you check your social media feed right when you’re out of bed?

Hal Elrod, in his book The Miracle Morning says: “How you wake up each day and your morning routine (or lack thereof) dramatically affects your levels of success in every single area of your life... By simply changing the way you wake up in the morning, you can transform any area of your life, faster than you ever thought possible.”

The way that our day begins also has a lot to do with how the day ended the night before.

Ensuring you get enough sleep to feel energised and rested, avoiding late eating and drinking so your body doesn’t feel sluggish, and keeping work hours reasonable so your mind has time to recover – all of these elements matter and can become part of your overall design.

Here are a few tips that may help:

Mindfulness practice: Gratitude, meditation, deep breathing – anything that works for you to focus your mind, and bring it into the present.

Exercise: Moving your body first thing in the day generates endorphins, and mood follows action. It can be five minutes or 50 minutes, but moving always feels good – not always before, or even during – but definitely afterwards.

Stretching: Either before you exercise, or a few minutes afterwards, or even for a few long seconds as you wake up, as a practice on its own.

Hydration: Water (add lemon if you like), herbal tea, coffee. Whatever you decide, drink it mindfully, and if you can, try doing it device-free.

Journalling/time with your diary: Gratitude can also be included here, as well as what you’d like your day to look like, and what your priorities are.

Being out in nature: The sunrise, or watering your indoor plants, or a brief walk outdoors.

Reading: Depending on how early you’ve woken up, and what reading you’ve selected to relax, learn or broaden your mind. Social media and news don’t count – they can come later, if you still really need them.

Remember not to follow anyone else’s “winning” routine – rather create your own, and tweak it as you see fit. Your personal morning ritual can be more than an hour, or it can be just 10 minutes. It can look different on different days of the week. The idea is that you have consciously made time at the start of each day to be present, focused and with yourself.

Finishing the day well

Many of us start our days off strong – well intentioned and motivated, healthy and focused. Too many of us finish those same days off weakly and unhealthily, with a lack of intention and discipline, and feeling overwhelmed and unnecessarily tired.

Finishing the day in a slump often means starting the next day in a similar way. You may find that you rise feeling tired and lethargic, without a clear sense of what you would like the day ahead of you to hold.

The end of the day can offer a quiet, calm space, a moment to process what has happened, set intentions for tomorrow, and ease into rest.

We can choose to spend it enjoying our hobbies, having fun with friends, sharing quality time with loved ones, or simply being in our own company. The exhausted collapse onto the couch, drink in hand, doesn’t always “park” the day as well as we hope, nor does it help us end on the same positive note with which we began.

One of the most effective ways to improve your overall experience is to enhance the quality of your day itself, bit by bit. Try to reduce the elements that overwhelm you; take on fewer commitments, choose the ones that matter most, and focus on carrying them out in a way that feels genuinely satisfying.

In his book Deep Work, Cal Newport reminds us that “what we choose to focus on and what we choose to ignore – plays in defining the quality of our life”. To experiment with an exercise to incorporate more focused work in your work day, you can refer to this brief article that I wrote in July as a result of reading Newport’s book.

Stick to your plan during the day as much as possible and use your values to guide your choices. Choose to enjoy your day as it progresses; because for one of the days in your life to come, your evening will not arrive to be appreciated. The more energy you bring with you to the end of your day, the less likely you are to “check out” with unhealthy habits.

Have a plan for your evenings too, and fill them with things that are both good for you and your family, and bring you joy. Spending time with those you care about, a shared meal, quiet reading, music, a rowdy game, in-depth conversations, an interesting documentary, a fun movie.

Being intentional with the time together, or alone, is what lifts the quality of the experience. You can decide to include simple pleasures and practices at the start and end of your days that should leave you feeling clear, calm and contented. If you begin now, that peaceful and more “in control” feeling will carry over to the start of the next year too. DM