South Africa, World

While you were sleeping: 5 July 2017

By John Stupart 5 July 2017

Sagan breaks Cavendish's shoulder, Korea laughs off ICBM launch, and Hotdog eater a "hero of America."

Wednesday, 5 July 2017

“America’s health care system is neither healthy, caring, nor a system.” 
Walter Cronkite

 
 

The mysteries of the 5th ANC National Policy Conference are manifold, but there are several open secrets – on the issue of the economy, President Jacob Zuma’s “radical” faction is pitted against deputy president Cyril Ramaphosa’s “constitutional” faction, a battle for the future of the party that also determines what South Africa will become: either a developing nation in the throes of a fierce reconfiguration of its economy; or a country attempting the sober implementation of policies rubber-stamped by policy wonks here and in Davos. Since the ousting of President Thabo Mbeki in 2007, no internecine argument has been so vicious.

 
 
 

Sagan disqualified for Cavendish argy-bargy

World Champion Peter Sagan was booted out of the Tour de France on Tuesday after a “dangerous move”. Mark Cavendish was elbowed and crashed into the barriers, 200m from the finish line with the Team Dimension Data rider saying he was “not optimistic about staying on”. Hours later Cavendish confirmed his exit with a broken shoulder blade. 

 

Alaska now in North Korean missile range

While Americans celebrated their Fourth of July with fireworks, North Korea was celebrating a rocket of a different kind. A new long-range missile type was confirmed to be the subject of this week’s test. It is essentially an ICBM capable of reaching Alaska and it appeared as though President Donald Trump’s promise to never let the US be in range of North Korea has already been broken. For Trump, few options remain on the table. Dear Leader appears to be playing Asian strategic projection better than America ever possibly expected.

 

Federer calls for calm amidst Wimbledon drop-outs

Seven men have dropped out of Wimbledon in the opening rounds so far. Roger Federer has since appealed to Grand Slams not to be “panicked” about the situation, after the suggestion of reducing matches to best-of-three. Federer beat Alexandr Dolgopolov after he pulled out just 43 minutes into the match complaining of a sore ankle. Earning £35,000 just for pitching up at Wimbledon may have something to do with the slew of bottom-ranking players getting “injured” in the first round.

 

‘Jaws’ demolishes dogs in minutes

Forgetting about the threat of a Korean nuclear Armageddon for a few minutes, Joey “Jaws” Chestnut demolished the competition at the Coney Island wiener-eating contest. Jaws wolfed down 72 hotdogs and buns in 10 minutes. The winner for the 10th time running, the grandmaster Chestnut was praised by the competition organiser: “He is an American hero. He stands as a representative of freedom, of the American ideal.”

 
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IN NUMBERS

2.5

The number of times more likely PhD students are to develop psychiatric disorders than highly educated, non-PhD plebians.

 

FACTS OF THE DAY

Today in 1975 Arthur Ashe became the first black man to win the Wimbledon singles title.

Female-named hurricanes kill more people on average than male hurricanes. This is due to people not being as intimidated by the former as the latter.

 

 

FEATURED ARTICLES

OPINIONISTAS

From a scratch to the danger of gangrene

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A lack of land is at the root of poverty

A column by ANDILE LUNGISA

 
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